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Stolen Flowers for Mommy 22 Sep 2009 | 11:47 pm
My dad shows up in a lot of my stories, mostly due to the fact that, of my two parents, he is the funnier one (sometimes even intentionally). Don't get me wrong, Mom's got a great sense of humor too (...
Extra! Extra! Read All About It! 19 Sep 2009 | 11:27 pm
"Bartender, make it a whiskey sour!" That was my usual order at the Little White House Bar and Grill on the corner of Hallock and Bound Brook Road. I usually stopped in for a drink before work. I cl...
Sailing Away 16 Sep 2009 | 10:17 pm
"I'm sailing away Set an open course for the virgin sea. 'Cause I've got to be free Free to face the life, that's ahead of me . . . " / I was driving along Interstate 15 not too long ago, flipping thr...
What Ever Happened To . . . Pebbles Flintstone? 14 Sep 2009 | 01:54 am
The only daughter of Fred and Wilma Flintstone, Pebbles lived as normal a childhood as possible, given that the family dog was a dinosaur and their kitchen sink was a woolly mammoth. She had a bubbly ...
The Teacher Files, Volume IV: Mr. Raymond 10 Sep 2009 | 11:23 pm
Every time I hear the theme to "Green Acres" my butt clenches and I break out into a cold sweat. Thanks very much, Mr. Raymond. Archie Raymond was my Drivers' Education teacher, and he had this habi...
An American Icon to Address Students 8 Sep 2009 | 10:14 pm
The following is a work of fiction. Any similarity to actual events is, um, purely coincidental. On Tuesday morning, via the Major League Baseball website and ESPN, New York Yankees' shortstop Derek ...
The Spirit Was Willing, But the Fists Were Weak 6 Sep 2009 | 11:11 pm
Growing up, I had two distinct personality traits that would seem to be in direct conflict with each other: a sarcastic sense of humor, and extremely poor fighting skills. Given this potentially deadl...
Somewhere, Satchmo is Vomiting 4 Sep 2009 | 01:42 am
Ken Gorelick (aka "Kenny G") is probably the most well-known saxophonist in America, as far as the general public is concerned. And this is sad, because Gorelick is an absolute joke as a jazz musician...
Maugeritaville's Greatest Hits (Such as They Are) 3 Sep 2009 | 12:00 pm
Here are some pieces that I had great fun writing. I hope you'll take a few minutes to revisit a couple, or if you're new 'round these parts, check out some of the ones you missed. Curse You, Evel Kn...
What Ever Happened To . . . Snap, Crackle, and Pop? 1 Sep 2009 | 12:31 am
Aside from the legendary Cap'n Crunch and perhaps the Trix Rabbit, the most famous breakfast cereal representatives in history would have to be the Rice Krispies icons Snap, Crackle, and Pop. The sons...
