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Never write a title when you're angry, becPOOP! POOP POOP POOP POOOOOOOP! 12 May 2012 | 04:24 pm
There are people in this world who think I'm incapable of disciplining my pets. That I'm incapable of punishing them when they do something wrong. Mm. Really. Incapable. Does this look incapable t...
I view my titles as a means of expressing my love for you, (insert reader's name here). 26 Mar 2012 | 08:50 am
May all the bugs in your food turn out to be poppy seeds. May you always pick the fastest cashier. May your analogies always make sense and your anecdotes never ramble. May your dog always make it....
I bet I could finish writing a title in under ten seco 23 Mar 2012 | 05:30 pm
The Twelve Times of Day 1) Coffee time 2) Yell at cars time. 3) Watch the time time. 4) Coffee time. 5) Try to stop watching the time time. 6) Drive badly time. 7) Coffee time. 8) Dinner time....
Write a title... done. Hey, that was the only thing on the list. Oh well, done is done. Cookie please! 20 Mar 2012 | 05:34 pm
Perfectly Valid Reasons to be Happy Your gloves happen to have the exact same number of fingers as your hands do. Turns out the scary thing in the back of your fridge hasn't even expired yet. The b...
sdrawkcab eltit eht etirw uoy fi skrow ylno ti 14 Mar 2012 | 05:28 pm
SHH! The dog just ate bread. Now we wait. Apparently I need complete silence to be superstitious. I actually didn't know that about myself until just now. Neither did I know I was superstitious u....
Hey, for you guys? The good title. Definitely the good title. 10 Mar 2012 | 07:31 pm
These are my fishies. They keep me safe. Nothing bad happens in fishie land. Never ever. No it DOESN'T. The last person who bathed in my tub was the elderly man whose house I bought following his d...
And for those who hate titles, piping hot tough cookies up your nose! 8 Mar 2012 | 08:28 pm
Ten Reasons Not to Pour Soup Down Your Pants an unfavorable post about soup for the benefit of my beloved and most passionate soup hating readers 1) The crackers itch. 2) What dogs lack in critic.....
15) Write a title for this post! 7 Mar 2012 | 07:48 pm
Blooooooog Cooooooonteeeeeeest! Follow these easy 13 14 15 steps to enter! 1) Follow my blog publicly. And passionately. This is important. I have to believe you mean it for your entry to qualify. I ...
Someday all my titles will bloom into full essays. About writing essays. 5 Mar 2012 | 02:42 pm
A little bit about me? Okay. Well... I'm single, love animals, love dancing, love going to the library, and my hobbies include painting, playing the mandolin, learning French, and raising mutants. No...
Oh look. I'm being self referential about my self referential titles. How precocious. 3 Mar 2012 | 07:23 pm
New Slogans for the Soup Industry Woo hoo! Look at me! I'm food blogging! SOUP - because if it's not soup, you're chewing too much. Enjoy your meal with the safest utensil. Enjoy SOUP. It's what o...
