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Walrus attacks wolverine 27 Aug 2013 | 05:35 pm
A walrus (left) dangerously attacked a wolverine last night. With rare and spectacular ferocity, an blubbery Arctic walrus attacked and bloodied a wolverine yesterday, leaving the smaller but feistie...
Wrestling fans shocked to learn Ted DiBiase Jr. was still employed by WWE 26 Aug 2013 | 09:52 pm
Ted DiBiase Jr. is now officially out of WWE, instead of just presumably. Wrestling fans were unanimously surprised today by Ted DiBiase Jr.’s video announcement that he is leaving World Wrestling En...
Miley Cyrus seeks career advice from Chyna 26 Aug 2013 | 06:09 pm
Miley Cyrus credits her VMA performance to the advice she received from Chyna (inset). Miley Cyrus, the former Disney teen star who is trying re-invent herself in an “edgier” style, has reportedly so...
Funkasaurus and Funkadactyls extinct after funksteroid hits Planet Funk 25 Aug 2013 | 06:39 pm
The Funkasaurus and Funkadactyls were wiped out by a funksteroid. Two species were wiped into extinction this week after a funksteroid slammed into Planet Funk, killing the last known Funkasaurus and...
Vince McMahon shocked to discover wrestling is rigged 25 Aug 2013 | 02:56 am
Vince McMahon was distraught to find out that wrestling is not a legitimate sporting competition. World Wrestling Entertainment Chairman Vince McMahon was shocked and devastated to learn today that p...
Bray Wyatt slims down by cutting back on worlds 24 Aug 2013 | 08:41 pm
Bray Wyatt says he is much happier now that he stopped eating worlds and is less husky. Professional wrestler and redneck cult leader Bray Wyatt has lost weight and trimmed his waistline since cuttin...
WWE repackages Sami Zayn as El Specifico 24 Aug 2013 | 04:06 am
Sami Zayn will make his main-roster debut under the name El Specifico. World Wrestling Entertainment is reportedly preparing to give rookie performer Sami Zayn a “major push” on the main roster, but ...
Wrestling action figures hidden just in case date goes well 23 Aug 2013 | 05:45 am
Troy Cooper hastily hid his wrestling dolls in hopes that his first date with a new girl might wind up in his bedroom. On the off-chance that his first date with an attractive classmate goes well, av...
Austin 3:17 says “I apologize for whipping your ass” 22 Aug 2013 | 05:01 am
The Book of Austin is actually about repentance and forgiveness. A little-known verse in the biblical Book of Austin — Chapter 3, Verse 17 — seems to contradict the violent message extolled in the mo...
Shawn Michaels finds smile, kills it with crossbow 21 Aug 2013 | 05:23 am
After a long search, Shawn Michaels finally found, and killed, his smile. Retired professional wrestler and avid outdoorsman Shawn Michaels finally found his lost smile yesterday, then promptly kille...
