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Hoochie Mama? 21 May 2012 | 02:06 pm

It's hard to believe that I'll be 35 tomorrow.  When I was a kid—and even in my early twenties—35 sounded ridiculously "grown up," and 40 seemed positively ancient.  Yet here I am, feeling perfectly f...

My Memories & the Eiffel "Cow"er 3 May 2012 | 06:17 pm

As we wrapped up our trip to Paris, I found myself longing for some souvenir of my crazy adventure.  I had been fantasizing about finding a quaint little boutique where I could buy some ridiculously e...

The Potty and the Pussycat 20 Apr 2012 | 04:30 am

I was there—I was finally in Paris!  It was the morning of my first full day in France, and after the horrific travel adventures I'd had on the trip over, I was happy that we were venturing out on foo...

Fight or Flight ... to Paris!! 7 Apr 2012 | 08:00 am

I sat at the airport, fighting to gulp down the firmest (and most expensive) "pretzel bites" I had ever encountered.  I had spent the whole week vacillating between frantic worrying and manic exciteme...

Freaks of Nature 17 Mar 2012 | 05:46 am

Well, I have just returned from my weekend in France, and my head is spinning with all the crazy stories I have to tell.  Regardless of where I travel, I seem to bring my own special brand of bad luck...

Strange Brew 22 Feb 2012 | 05:09 pm

I'm not a big fan of the mall—mostly because I tend to have horrible experiences there.  I frequently get hoodwinked by enthusiastic salespeople who sell me junk I don't need and never use, and I have...

Broke Butt Mountain 9 Feb 2012 | 05:03 pm

Most people have love-hate relationships with their bodies, and I'm no different—although it's not for the reasons one might think.  I don't hate the stretch marks that I bear as a result of having my...

Fowl Play 14 Jan 2012 | 02:23 pm

My husband is considering nominating me for the show "Worst Cooks in America," and I think I may actually have quite a good chance at winning the title—assuming the title actually goes to the worst co...

Till Death Do Us Barf 6 Jan 2012 | 04:35 pm

Weddings are wonderful, festive, life-changing, and occasionally disastrous events. I suppose Forrest Gump's famous line could apply to them, in that you never know what you're gonna get. I was absol...

I'm a Naughty Little Santa 22 Dec 2011 | 10:51 am

No, not that kind of naughty Santa—although I admit that would be fun.  I have often thought it would be nice to dress up in one of those sexy Santa-girl costumes and pose for my husband á la Mariah C...

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