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Twilight Sleep 8 Jan 2013 | 07:30 pm

I am not, for the moment, living in the real world. I am staying with my father, in the house in which I was raised, as he recuperates from an illness. He requires tube feedings, and is on a regimen o...

Physics, Metaphysics, and a Florentine Journal 31 Dec 2012 | 09:26 pm

Maybe a week ago, I was taking books out of what had been my mother’s home office. There’s a period after a death when it seems wrong to erase the person by removing all of their possessions as if the...

What My (Expletive Deleted) Problem Is 16 Dec 2012 | 11:27 pm

I see it now, as clear and bright as the crystalline drops of rain dotting the red berries outside my window. They hang there, brighter, smaller ghosts of the vivid berries, disappearing if I squint. ...

Chex Mix 8 Dec 2012 | 02:43 am

Today was meant to be a day out of the trenches; I had envisioned a leisurely morning watching “Charmed” reruns, maybe a little baking and laundry, and then reading the 2,700 newspapers lying on the c...

New Mom 7 Dec 2012 | 08:02 am

I haven’t written much lately. The hours of my days seem to be sucked into a vortex of duties. They are not unpleasant, and I begrudge nobody, but there are times, whole hours, whole days when I want ...

Rolling With It 23 Nov 2012 | 08:29 pm

Yesterday morning I got up at 6:00AM to get cleaned up, pack two cars full of donated food, and drive to a local community center to help with their annual Thanksgiving meal.  I wanted to help because...

My Yiddeshe Thanksgivings 20 Nov 2012 | 05:32 pm

Until I was sixteen, Thanksgiving was spent at my maternal grandparents’ house in Ashtabula, Ohio. Often prefaced by a blizzard, and by my father worrying about making the five hour drive with 5% visi...

Raw 15 Nov 2012 | 11:01 pm

I am alarmed by suggestions that I am handling the loss of my mother with anything approaching grace. I worry that there may be people reading my words and thinking that they should be all philosophic...

The Year of All Good Things 13 Nov 2012 | 10:16 pm

This was supposed to be a great year. According to me, anyway. It was the year I turned 50, the year my house turned 100…what appeared to be an auspicious, glorious year of celebrations and milestones...

Atheists and Foxholes 23 Oct 2012 | 10:16 pm

When my brother told me my mother was really going to die, that there would be no amazing reprieve this time, I got the answer to a question I’d been asking most of my life. I always wondered if, when...

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